


Red Shift

by mylittlecthulhu (marineko)



Series: Red Shift [10]
Category: Arashi (Band), Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-07-24
Packaged: 2019-06-14 19:23:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15395709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marineko/pseuds/mylittlecthulhu
Summary: Redshift: A shift in the lines of an object's spectrum toward the red end. Redshift indicates that an object is moving away from the observer. The larger the redshift, the faster the object is moving. / For those reading this fic for the first time on Ao3 - this is the Sakuraiba story!





	1. One

“One, two, three, four!”

Even before he finished counting out, he could hear the beginnings of Aiba’s bass. The melody was fast, smooth, but almost insidious in the way it hooks the audience every time they play it live. After awhile, Nino and Jun joined in, twin guitars competing with lick after lick, driving the energy of the song higher. More intense. He took a quick glance at the faces of their current audience. By the time his drums joined in the beat, Ohno knew that the record deal was going to be theirs.

By the time the song was over, the band grinned at each other, knowing they did well. Ohno stood up, and stuck his drum sticks in his back pocket. “What do you think?” he asked, addressing Yamanaka-san.

The ex-star and current big-shot producer at Voyager Records answered with a smile. “It was good. You were good.” He gave a small laugh, before continuing, “but then again, you wouldn’t have gotten this audition if I hadn't known at least that much. We’ll talk about this later tonight, at dinner. My assistant will handle the details.” He waved, once, and left the room.

“What the hell does that mean?” Jun asked, turning to Ohno. Aiba was looking at him, too, but didn’t say anything. Nino’s mouth was hanging open, as if he couldn’t believe that Yamanaka-san could be so blase after they played so well. 

“I guess it means... we’ll find out at dinner.” Ohno frowned, wondering if he was off in his judgement. He thought that the band played their best, put everything they’ve got, in that one song. But Yamanaka-san acted like it wasn’t anything special at all. Ohno shook his head, and told himself that nothing was decided yet, and that he had to keep the morale up for everyone. He looked around at his band mates. “If the song wasn’t enough, we’ll charm him at dinner for sure.” He hoped. “And close your mouth, Nino, before something flies into it.”

})i({

“Here’s the thing. I know that Red Shift has been around for a couple of years. I know that you’ve worked hard, and now you’ve gathered an impressive fan base. I know that your demo, that you released yourselves, was a hit despite the less-than-great production quality. I know that you put on great live shows, and from what I heard during your audition, I know that you are good musicians.” Yamanaka-san stopped, and looked around the dinner table as if to gauge their reactions.

“But. There is a but, isn’t there?” Ohno was the only one who spoke out.

Yamanaka-san nodded. “But you are not as experienced as I would like. You’ve been around for a long time, and the fact that you've only released _one_ record in that whole time is against you. And Matsumoto-san,” he said, at which Jun snapped to attention, “while you have a good voice, I’m not sure if I would say that you have the star power to pull Red Shift through.” Noticing that rest of the band wanted to protest, he quickly said, “I don’t mean to say that you’re no good as a vocalist, or anything like that. You’re perfectly adequate.”

“But I’m not good enough to debut on a Voyager Records album,” Jun concluded quietly.

“You are, too, good enough!” Nino exclaimed, incensed. Aiba nodded vigourously in agreement. 

Ohno just nodded, making the rest wonder who he agreed with - Nino or Jun. “I see what you mean, Yamanaka-san, and I’m glad that you’re being honest with us. However, if what you’re suggesting is that we replace Jun, then we would rather continue as we are.” He smiled at his band members, hoping to reassure them. “We’ll manage, even without a deal with Voyager. As for Jun’s singing, maybe he’s not exactly there yet, but I know that he has something special. A quality that, with time, will improve and shine brightly.” _What am I saying?_ he wondered. _I have no idea if what I said even made sense._ But he believed that Jun will be a great singer one day, with all of his heart.

“Oh, I do not disagree,” Yamanaka-san said. “In fact, that’s kind of what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“You want Jun to take singing lessons? Like an idol or something?” Aiba asked, earning him a dirty look from Jun.

Yamanaka-san chuckled. “Not exactly. It’s just... what do you think about bringing in a second vocalist for your first album? Matsumoto-san will still be vocalist, but we’ll change the arrangements of the songs to suit a second vocal. And to make the songs more marketable, of course. The harmonies would definitely work better...” he murmured the last sentence, as if talking to himself.

“A second vocal? One of us?”

“No. Not a Red Shift member, but someone else managed by Voyager. Someone who is already well-known, someone whose presence would also generate a lot of interest in your band.”

Aiba looked at Jun, concerned about how his band mate would be feeling if they did such a thing, but Jun looked as if he was seriously considering it. He turned to Nino, who looked displeased with the idea, and to Ohno, whose expression he couldn’t read.

“Jun,” Ohno said.

“Mm?”

“What do you think?”

“Well,” Jun replied, “I think it’s a good idea. And if we get a record deal out of it, why not?”

“I’m asking what _you_ think, not if you think it’s good for the band.”

“I know what you mean, Oh-chan,” Jun said, his voice a little testy. “After all, we’ve been friends forever. Yes, _I_ think it’s a good idea. If we bring in a well-known vocalist for our first album, it means I could learn from them, right? And,” he continued, addressing Yamanaka-san, “it’s only for this one album, right?”

Yamanaka-san nodded. “Yes, if you’ll agree to the terms, we could start a basic contract, and the chosen vocalist would only be with you for the duration of your debut album. Anyway,” he said with a dry voice, “he would most likely want to go back to his own career soon after.”

“So who is he?” Nino asked.

Yamanaka-san looked at his watch. “He should be here soon, I think.” He glanced at the door of the private dining area, and right on cue, it opened. 

“Sorry, Yamanaka-san, I got held back at my last meeting. I’m running late the whole day, it seems.” 

“It’s fine. We had a lot to discuss anyway. This, here, is Red Shift.” 

“Hi there, pleased to meet you all. We’re going to be working together, so I hope we get along.”

No one answered the greeting. All the members of Red Shift stared at the newcomer, dumbfounded. Then Nino gave a low, barely audible curse. Ohno looked like he wanted to laugh. Aiba just stared, his eyes wide. Jun ignored the newcomer and said to Yamanaka-san, “but - he’s some kind of _pop_ star!” He said the word 'pop' like it was an insult.

Yamanaka-san just raised an eyebrow, as the newcomer took a place at the table.

“Ne, Yamanaka-san, you didn’t tell them? How naughty of you.” He then turned back to the group, gave a light bow, and a mischievous smile. “I’m Sakurai Sho, pop star extraordinaire.” 

Yamanaka-san snorted when he heard Sho’s introduction, but quickly regained himself. “Ahem. Where was I? Ah... yes. The company has decided to request Sakurai Sho as the vocalist for your album - he is one of our biggest names, and,” he said, looking pointedly at Jun, “despite being a pop singer, he could teach you a thing or two.”


	2. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jun meets (and finds out about) Sho.

The next couple of weeks were very hectic for the members of Red Shift. It wasn’t just the rearranging of their songs, which didn’t seem to go as well as they had hoped - Sho’s suggestions were usually veto-ed by Nino, who wrote most of the songs. There was a constant tension between them that Jun didn’t understand – he knew that it must be hard for Nino to let someone else come in and change his songs, but he would have thought that Nino would either confront Sho about what was bothering him, or settle things after a discussion. Instead, no matter how politely Sho made his suggestions, or how friendly Sho tried to be, there were times when Jun thought that Nino was openly hostile.

Ohno had reverted back to the quiet person he was during the early days of the band, and left Nino and Sho to argue about things among themselves. Jun was trying to be patient, but every time Sho tried to suggest something to him, he, too, felt like he would snap. The tense atmosphere in the studio wasn’t exactly helping. Aiba, usually a cheerful addition to their group, was uncharacteristically quiet. As for Ohno - he had thought that the compromise with Voyager Records a good one, but from the look of things, their band was falling apart.

By the end of the second week even Yamanaka-san, whose patience was said to be never ending, had had enough. They had barely finished the arrangements of one song. When everyone was thinking of calling it quits for the day, he said, “I think thinking that we could just jump into this and work together immediately is a mistake.”

“What are you saying, Yamanaka-san?” Jun asked, frowning. He knew that it was childish, the resentment he felt towards Sho. But he was annoyed that the pop star would just walk into their life, decide that they’re not good enough, and change things around so that things would suit him. 

“I don’t know.” Yamanaka-san sighed. “I never had to baby-sit children before.” He sighed again, realising that he had just called five grown men children. “Anyway, let’s try this. The weekend is coming up, so the five of you should do something together. Bond or something. Yes,” he said, deciding that he liked the idea, “you should all get to know Sakurai-kun better and vice versa, and develop a good working relationship.” He paused. “Or just tolerate each other. I think I could live with you guys just tolerating each other.”

Yamanaka-san sighed for the third time, got up, and left the room.

The four members of Red Shift looked at each other. 

“What do you think?” Jun asked Aiba, who was fooling around with Nino’s guitar. Aiba just shrugged without looking up. Jun frowned, worried, and turned to Nino. “Nino?”

“I guess. Whatever works.” He smiled at Ohno – it looked forced, but Jun wasn’t about to ask him about it. “Oh fearless leader, do you have any ideas on what we shall do during our bonding session?” 

Sho, who was just listening to the rest of them, smiled. “What about we head to my vacation house? It’s near this lake and it’s peaceful there. We could spend some time there and even work on the arrangements. Together. That would make Yamanaka-san happy.”

“I didn’t ask _you_.”

“Nevertheless, for the time being, Sakurai-san is one of us,” Ohno said firmly. “Thank you for your suggestion, Sakurai-san.”

“You’re welcome. So, what do you think? Shall we go?”

“I have the perfect idea of what we should do this weekend.” Ohno smiled widely, and a warning immediately rang in Jun’s mind.

“You’re not saying what I think you’re saying,” Jun muttered.

Ohno ignored him. “Yes, I have a great idea. Let’s go -”

“Please let’s not go fishing!” Nino said, at the same time Ohno said “fishing!”

Sho laughed, amused by the dismayed looks on Nino and Jun’s face. “Fishing? Why fishing?”

“Because it’s the ultimate manly sport! It tests your patience and endurance and -”

“Oh-chan, you don’t even know if his lake house is a good place for fishing.”

“Actually, it is. I just never really bothered, but it sounds interesting enough, why don’t we go?”

})i({

In the end, Ohno went fishing by himself. He figured, he didn’t have a problem with working with Sakurai-san personally. Even if the man was strange enough to have a house near such a wonderful fishing spot and _had never fished_. Ohno needed time to be alone, and to think. He couldn’t do that with Nino picking fights with Sakurai-san and dragging Jun into it as well. And Aiba... Ohno sighed, and chuckled at the thought that he was beginning to sound like Yamanaka-san. He was worried about Aiba, who was not his normal self at all.

Indoors, Jun sat alone at the kitchen counter. Nino, upon seeing Sakurai-san’s game collection, had persuaded Aiba to play a couple of games with him; Jun hoped that it would help cheer Aiba up a little. It felt weird when their bassist was quiet all the time. Almost eerie. While he was contemplating the reason of his band mate’s silence, he heard footsteps walking in.

“Are you guys done already?” he asked, looking up. Realising that it was Sho who walked in, his smile disappeared. “Oh. It’s you.”

Sho had been perpetually polite and cheerful since their first meet, but Jun noticed that his smile was wavering, and felt a stab of guilt. “I’ll leave if you want to be alone,” Sho said, turning to leave.

“Don’t. Sakurai-san, this is your house. Remember?” Jun smiled in apology, and gestured towards the empty chairs. “Sit down if you want.”

Sho’s smile came back in full force. He walked back in, poured himself some juice, and sat opposite Jun. “Really, you could call me Sho,” he told Jun. “At the rate we’re going, we’re going to work on this album for a longer time than expected, and it’s strange to be so formal when we work together, don’t you think?”

Jun shrugged noncommittally. “I guess,” he finally said after a pause. “It’s strange to be so casual too, though. I mean, here I am, in Sakurai Sho’s vacation house!” He laughed a little. “It’s a little too strange right now.” 

“That pop star thing, that’s just my job, you know. Like Red Shift is yours.”

“I love Red Shift. I love everything about making a life with music,” Jun said, wondering how one could say that music was just a ‘job.’

“I’m not saying that I don’t love what I do. I wouldn’t be doing it otherwise, would I? But it’s also my job. I guess I’m saying that it’s not all that I am.”

Jun nodded. “I think I know what you mean. Is that why you’re doing this, with our band? Our music is really not your usual type.”

“That’s part of it. I’ve been feeling like I needed a new challenge for quite some time. When Yamanaka-san told me about getting another singer for your album, I grabbed the opportunity and asked that he bring me into the project.”

Jun was about to reply, when they heard voices talking animatedly. 

“I really never played that game before!”

“I don’t believe you. There’s no way a first timer could beat me three times in a row, and -”

Laughter. “You’re just mad because you lost. Next time I beat you -” Aiba’s voice faltered as he and Nino stepped into the kitchen, and his expression turned from happy to almost studiously aloof.

“Aiba, is something wrong?” Jun asked, getting up. He had never seen Aiba acting that way.

“It’s nothing,” Aiba replied, his tone neutral. “I just remembered that I forgot something. Go on,” he said to Nino. “I’ll go back to the game room myself.”

When Aiba had left, Jun and Nino looked at each other. “You know what’s wrong with him?” Jun asked.

“Maybe you should ask _him_ ,” Nino answered, and turned to go after Aiba.

Confused, Jun turned to Sho. “What does this have to do with you? You guys have barely spoken to each other since we started on the album.”

Sho looked away. “That’s the other thing,” he said quietly. “Aiba and I actually used to know each other, way back when.” He drank the last of his juice, and smiled wryly at Jun. “We used to date.” He paused, before continuing, “I hate that word - ‘to date.’ What’s that mean, anyway? I guess maybe I should say ‘we were romantically involved’, but I wasn’t much of a romantic.” He laughed at himself. A bitter sound, but Jun wasn’t paying attention. His mind was on overload, replaying the same sentence again and again.

_We used to date_.


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which... there is hope?

_We used to date._

The words still ringing in his mind, Jun didn’t really pay attention when Sho excused himself and left him alone in the kitchen. 

Aiba used to date Sakurai Sho.

The thought that Aiba even _knew_ someone as famous as Sho was unbelievable enough to Jun, but the fact that he didn’t mention it _at all_ was a thought even harder to conceive. He supposed that it was before Sho got famous, but still. Whenever they were walking together and saw a poster of him, or talked about an advertisement Sho was in, Aiba could have said something. 

_Like what?_ he wondered. _’Hey, isn’t Sakurai Sho getting more and more popular these days? Oh, by the way, he used to be my boyfriend’?_

Jun wasn’t even sure that he would’ve believed Aiba if he said something like that. But still.

_I thought we were close._

He wanted to know more, but Sho refused to say anything else about the matter after dropping the bomb of an information. Sho had thought that Jun and the rest of the band should know about his and Aiba’s past, since they were working together. But as for the rest of the story, he had said that Jun was Aiba’s friend and band mate, so he should hear it from Aiba himself. 

_But what if Aiba won’t say anything at all?_

})i({

Aiba was smiling at something Nino said. He was still a little pale, but he still had the same infectious smile. He and Nino were sitting on the same large beanbag, talking quietly. And smiling. It annoyed him that Nino made Aiba smile.

It ached that the smile disappeared as soon as Aiba noticed his arrival.

“Can I talk to you alone?” Sho asked, not looking at Nino. 

Nino looked at Aiba, who hesitated at first, but finally shrugged and said, “Sure.” At that, Nino got up and left the room without acknowledging Sho.

Sho looked around, and cursed his decision to make the game room ‘comfy.’ It felt stupid to sit on a beanbag when one is trying to have a serious talk, for some reason. 

Aiba seemed to know what he was thinking, and said, “I need some air. We can talk at the balcony.”

As they walked out together, Sho studied Aiba. He was thinner than he used to be, Sho observed. And his hair was different. But he still looked exactly the same. He wondered how different he would seem to Aiba.

They were quiet for some time, as neither of them knew what to say. After awhile, uncomfortable with the silence, Sho said, “he’ll never forgive me, will he?”

A look of guilt flashed in Aiba’s eyes. “I’m sorry. I told him that it’s not your fault, and that he should give you a break.”

Sho gave a small smile. Aiba remembered how he felt the first time he saw that smile, and looked away. “That’s just like you,” he heard Sho say. “Telling him to give me a break when I was the one who hurt you.”

“Well, he was your friend, too. I didn’t want the two of you to fight, just because of me.”

“And what about you? Can you – would you ever forgive me?”

Aiba turned to look at Sho again, and smiled weakly. “Of course... it’s just a shock, I think, seeing you again after... well. I’ll have to get over it. The shock, I mean.” He sounded a little flustered. Changing the subject, he gestured towards the house. “You’ve done well. I heard about all of your awards and singles rankings from Yamanaka-san the other day. He was so proud of you, like you’re his firstborn or something. Congratulations.”

“Is that a compliment or an insult, Mr. I’m-A-Serious-Musician?” Sho asked, amused.

“I’m not Jun,” Aiba said defensively. “I recognise talent when I see it.” Then his smile widened, and turned mischievous. “Although, that probably doesn’t apply now that you’ve become a lip-synching pop star who doesn’t play instruments.”

“Oh? This coming from the bassist of a band with, what, eight fans, including all of your parents, and Yuu-chan?” 

Aiba laughed, and Sho grinned in relief. He may have lost a lot of things to get as far as he had in life, but he could still make Aiba laugh.

})i({

When Ohno returned that evening, with dinner in tow, he was surprised by all that had transpired in his absence. He was glad that at least Jun and Aiba were talking normally with Sho, and even working on a couple of songs together. Aiba still seemed like he was trying too hard to be his usual self at times, while Sho was sometimes cheerful to the point where it annoyed Jun and Nino. Nino was still rather cold to Sho, which made things difficult since he wrote most of their songs, and Sho needed his input when he does the new arrangements. But they managed, and to Ohno, it was a vast improvement.

Ohno was just as surprised by the news of Sho and Aiba’s past, but it frustrated Jun that Nino already knew. When Jun complained - well, demanded loudly - that they should know the full story, Ohno said quietly in his “firm voice”, the one that the rest of them always listened to, that it was Aiba’s business and Aiba should deal with it as he pleased. Ohno seemed to have joined Nino’s “Find Ways To Keep Aiba Happy” club without an ounce of the curiosity that was eating Jun up.

But that was their leader, all right, Jun figured. His first reaction was probably concern for Aiba, rather than the burning questions that stirred in Jun’s mind when he first heard the news.

“Don’t you care at all?” he asked, as they sat outside on their last night there, watching the moon’s reflection on water. “This is _Aiba_ , and we’ve known him _forever_ , and _yet_.”

Ohno was quiet for awhile, and Jun thought that he wasn’t going to answer. But then he said, sounding both patient and fed up, the way he did sometimes, which Jun would never get. “Obviously, we haven’t known him _forever_ ,” Ohno said. “Aiba has a past that we don’t know about, and Sakurai-san does.”

“But –”

“Jun.” Ohno was definitely not happy, Jun realised, and he shrank back – just a little. “We’ve been over this.”

He had been looking at Ohno, but at those words Jun looked away, letting a long sigh fall from his lips. He didn’t reply.

“Aiba haven’t seen Sakurai-san in a long time,” Ohno reminded him, then, as if to placate. “He has a history – one with us, with Red Shift – that Sakurai-san doesn’t know about, too.”


	4. Four

FRIDAY EVENING

Whatever they did during their weekend off, it worked. Yamanaka-san was pleased to find that the band seemed to be working with Sho, and on occasion were even friendly with the pop star. By the end of the week, they had achieved more than the two previous weeks put together.

Red Shift was a talented band, he knew. Jun’s lyrics were simple, and yet somehow they always manage to strike a chord in him, which was how he had known that Red Shift’s audiences would feel the same. Aiba’s bass was simply remarkably addictive, and he had no doubt that it was one of the reasons they did so well in live shows. Knowing this, Nino always wrote songs that had strong, catchy bass lines. Ninomiya’s songwriting was not spectacular – yet – but it was definitely unique. Ohno was not as flashy as his bandmates, nor his talents as noticeable, but it was his steady beats that kept the rest of the band together, which was just as important. He had worked with bands much more talented than Red Shift that never made it past their first single because they weren’t grounded enough, and with Ohno Satoshi, he doubted that this band would have the same trouble.

As they were, Yamanaka-san thought, Red Shift would be more than good enough to succeed with rock fans. But with Sakurai Sho’s arrangements, Red Shift would be able to gather a larger audience. 

Yamanaka-san had a feeling that Red Shift was going to be one of his favourite (and best) bands to work with.

“All right, we’ll stop here for now,” he told the band. “I think we’ve progressed a lot. What are you doing this weekend?”

“ _Not_ being cooped up together in one house,” Jun answered, grinning. He waved goodbye at Aiba, who had practically flew out the door the moment Yamanaka-san said ‘all right.’ “After working all day every day in a small room, I’m guessing we’re sick of each other’s ugly faces for now.”

“My mom’s birthday is this weekend, so I’m going to my parents’ place to celebrate,” Nino said. “Sunday, 3pm. You guys can come; she’ll love to see you again,” he said to Ohno and Jun. 

“I’ll try to make it,” Ohno said in reply. “Any ideas on what she’d like as a gift?”

“Well -”

Leaving them to their conversation, Yamanaka-san turned to Sho. “See you in the studio tomorrow morning then, okay?” He waved goodbye and left.

“What was that about?” Jun asked Sho, curious.

Sho smiled. “Red Shift is a side project for me, if you remember. I still haven’t finished recording my new single, which I’m working on with Yamanaka-san tomorrow.” As Jun nodded, Sho turned to Nino. “Um, Nino. Does your mom know we’re working together?” 

Nino shrugged. “I haven’t told her.”

“Oh.” Sho looked downcast, but tried to hide it – not well enough, because Jun could easily tell he was disappointed. “Well. Please send her my best, okay? Tell her I haven’t forgotten her great cooking.” 

“You know Nino’s mom?” Ohno asked Sho.

“Sure. We went to high school together,” Sho replied. “I think I spent more time at Nino’s than at my own home back then. I was probably half in love with Nino’s mom; her food was the best ever.”

“Why don’t you come too, then?” Jun asked. “I’m sure she’ll love to see you again.” Nino’s mother always liked it when the house was full of people, as far as he knew. 

“I don’t think he has the time,” Nino said, glaring at Jun. “He’s got work this weekend.”

“Actually -” Sho started to say, before he noticed Nino’s expression. He continued, “Nino’s right. I have work to do, unfortunately. Please tell her I said hi, though.”

When Sho had left, Jun and Ohno looked at Nino.

“What?”

“Why are you so mean to him?” Ohno asked.

“Why didn’t you tell us you went to school with _Sakurai Sho_?” Jun asked.

“Because you didn’t ask, and even if you did, it’s none of your business.” Nino answered. “ _And_ because he’s an idiot from the past who should stay in the past.” He stormed out.

Ohno and Jun looked at each other. Jun looked frustrated; Ohno looked perplexed. Finally, Ohno asked Jun, “Dinner?”

“Sure.”

As they left the building, Jun asked, “It’s your treat, right?”

Ohno laughed. “Okay.”

})i({

SATURDAY AFTERNOON

“Thanks for helping me shop, Aiba.”

“No problem,” Aiba said with an easy smile. “I needed to get a birthday present for Nino’s mom, too, and by shopping together we won’t end up getting her the same thing.” He lifted his shopping bag. “There’s a restaurant here that I love, do you want to have lunch together?”

“Jun said he’s going to cook lunch today, since I treated him for dinner last night,” Ohno said with a guilty look. “I’m sorry, after all I was the one who invited you out.”

“It’s fine. I just suddenly felt like eating out, is all.”

“Do you want to come over?”

“No, it’s okay. I probably need to bring back some takeaway for Nino anyway, or he’ll end up gaming the whole day without eating. He bought a new game on the way home yesterday, and he’s been at it all night.”

“Okay. See you tomorrow, then.”

Aiba walked to the small family restaurant he discovered a few days ago. One of these days, he would bring the rest of the band there, he decided. When he reached the restaurant, he was still debating whether to just buy takeaway food for both himself and Nino, or to eat there first before going home.

The waitress that greeted him was the same one that served him the last time he was there, so he gave her a familiar smile. “Kazue-san,” he said, remembering her name. “How are you?”

She smiled brightly. “I’m _so_ excited - guess what, Sakurai Sho is dining here!” She said the last part in an excited whisper, not wanting to alert other bypassers. Her boss had told her to keep it quiet that Sakurai-san occasionally dines at their restaurant, but the last time she talked to Aiba, he was very friendly to her and she felt like she had to share the news with _someone_.

“Eh?” Aiba asked, startled. “Sho-chan’s here?” He walked in without waiting for an answer, and saw for himself. The small restaurant was full, and noisy. If he didn’t know where Sho was sitting, all he would have to do was look at the other diners, who kept glancing over at the pop star’s table.

Sho was laughing. Aiba could only see him from behind, but he knew that Sho was laughing. Aiba could see the woman sitting opposite Sho very clearly - she was pretty, in a tomboy-ish way. Her hair was cropped short, and she did not wear any make-up. She was dressed in a plain t-shirt and torn jeans, and yet Aiba had never seen anyone look more elegant.

The last time he had seen her, she had long straight hair, and a girlish – if still frank – manner, but Aiba remembered her.

When she noticed Aiba staring at her, her eyes lit up and she waved over at him. “Aiba-kun!” she exclaimed. Her voice was still as loud as he remembered. “It’s Aiba-kun, right? What a small world! Come on over!”

He saw Sho’s shoulders stiffen, and he saw the hesitation before Sho turned to look in his direction. He wanted to leave right away, but he forced himself to walk towards the couple.

“It’s been awhile, hasn’t it, Michiyo-san,” he said politely. He nodded to Sho. “Sho-ch..” he trailed off, not knowing what to call Sho now.

“The restaurant is pretty full right now, you want to sit with us?” Michiyo asked.

“That’s all right,” Aiba said. “I’m just going to order takeaway.”

“Well, sit with us until your order arrive, then! It’s pretty amazing to just bump into you like this; how many years has it been, I wonder?” Her hands gestured wildly as she talked, as she tended to do when excited. “Sho told me that you guys are working together again.”

Aiba stared at her gesturing hands, unable to look at either her or Sho in the face. “Um, that’s okay,” he finally said. “The place looks really busy, so I’ll probably order from somewhere else. I’ve got to go. It’s - been great to meet you, Michiyo-san. It’s great that the two of you are still together, too.” He left hurriedly, despite hearing Michiyo calling his name.

He went straight home, forgetting about lunch. When he unlocked the front door, he could hear the sound from Nino’s game indoors.

})i({

Nino paused his game when he heard Aiba at the door. He had called Ohno and Jun’s apartment to ask about lunch, but Ohno told him that Aiba was going to bring him takeaway.

“You surely took your time,” he complained, as Aiba walked in. “I’m really hungry already.” He looked up and saw Aiba’s face. “What’s wrong?” he asked, getting up. 

Aiba just stood for awhile, trying to calm down. “I’m sorry, I forgot to get food.”

“That’s all right,” Nino said, hurrying towards his best friend. “We could go out. Or order in,” he amended, noticing that Aiba didn’t look eager to leave the house again. “What’s wrong?”

Aiba’s words were barely a whisper, but Nino heard him clearly.

“Sho-chan’s... engaged.”


	5. Five

In the end, Nino went out to buy food at a nearby Lotteria chain. He had went online to check if there are any Saizeriyas in the area, first, but he was out of luck. Somehow Saizeriya had always been Aiba’s choice of comfort food; it wasn’t something Nino had thought much about until then, when he was really wishing he could find a nearby branch. 

He returned to find Aiba still sitting at the dinner table, staring into space. He set down their lunch on the table and told Aiba to eat. When he was satisfied that Aiba was listening to him, he said, “Tell me what happened.”

“Remember the restaurant I was telling you about, that I said we should go together one of these days? Well, I was going to get our lunch from there...” Aiba trailed off and looked at the burger Nino had placed before him. “I’m sorry I forgot to get lunch.”

“Forget about it, already,” Nino said impatiently. “What’s important is, how did you know Sho’s engaged?”

“Well, I went to that restaurant, and he was there, with Michiyo-san.”

“Michiyo? You mean, Akita Michiyo?”

Aiba gave Nino a strange look. “How many Michiyos do we both know?”

Nino shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s just, wow.” He said quietly, “I thought they’ve broken it off ages ago. I haven’t met with anyone from high school for awhile, but I really thought I heard something about them breaking up.”

“No.” Aiba looked miserable as he told Nino, “They seemed like they’ve never been apart. They looked so good together, really.”

“And they told you they were engaged?”

“Not exactly.”

“Don’t tell me you walked into him proposing.”

Aiba squirmed, trying to get rid of the thought of walking into Sho proposing to Michiyo. “Not that, either. Thank god.”

“So how’d you know?”

“Her ring. Michiyo-san was wearing an engagement ring.” He looked away, not wanting Nino to see the tears that was starting to come. He wouldn’t cry, he told himself. After all, it was over between him and Sho. It was just shock, finding out the way he did. That’s all. After all, he had worked together with Sho for the past week, so it wasn’t as if the man didn’t have a chance to tell him himself. “You know how she used to talk really loud, and how she always gestured her hands wildly when she talked? Well, I always end up looking at her hands, even back then, and that’s why I noticed her ring today.”

“She was probably just rubbing it in,” Nino muttered, unsure of who he hated more at the moment, Michiyo or Sho.

“No, that’s not it. I don’t think she even thought about it. She was just too excited. She was _glowing_. She was just so happy.” Aiba was remembering her expression when he walked into the restaurant, before she noticed him. Sho was laughing at something she said. He hadn’t seen Sho look so relaxed in the last few weeks they’ve worked together. Even though Aiba had tried his best to act normally, Sho had been polite, and cheerful, but never relaxed. It was like he was trying to pretend that their past didn’t exist, despite the fact that it was Sho who first said that it was best to get it all out in the open, and that they should try to be friends again. In the end Aiba had started to arrive to their sessions exactly on time and leave as soon as he was allowed to, just so that he would hardly have to talk to Sho.

Nino was still asking him questions, but Aiba just said, “I’m tired. Really, it’s not a big deal. I mean, we broke up a long time ago, so it’s not any of my business if he got engaged. It’s just a surprise, that’s all. I’m going to my room now.” 

Aiba turned to leave, but was stopped by Nino, who said his name sharply. “Aiba.” Nino sighed, put down his burger on the plate in front of him, and walked up to his best friend. “You’ve never stopped being in love with him, have you?”

Aiba bit his lip, not knowing what to say. Nino just continued looking at him, as if waiting for a reply, so he finally said in a low voice, “I’d be pretty stupid if I said yes, wouldn’t I?” He looked like he was about to cry - he felt like he had been trying not to for so long. “I know it’s stupid to feel this way. He’s obviously forgotten about me.”

“You’re stupid,” Nino replied, moving forward to give his friend a comforting hug. “You’re really, really, stupid if you think that you could stop loving someone so easily.” When Aiba started to cry, Nino murmured, “You’re the most loving person I know. Don’t stop being you on account of that asshole, okay?”

})i({

The next morning, Aiba was rather withdrawn, and refused to speak of Sho any longer. Nino followed suit, and they tried to find neutral subjects to talk about, but spent most of the train ride to Nino’s parents’ place in silence.

When they arrived, almost all of their neighbors and friends were scattered around the Ninomiyas’ lawn, which seemed like an impossible feat to Nino and Aiba, since their house, while larger than most, was not really large enough to host such a large gathering. “Your family always go all out when it comes to celebrating birthdays,” Aiba said, smiling. “Somehow this year seem to be bigger than the previous ones.”

“At least it’s easier to avoid people in this crowd,” Nino said jokingly. “And speaking of people to avoid...”

“You guys finally made it!” Nino’s sister had noticed them arriving and rushed to greet them. “Ohno-kun and Matsumoto-kun are already here, somewhere. I think mom’s trying to matchmake them with some of the cousins,” she said, rolling her eyes at Nino. She gave Aiba a warm smile, continuing, “Aiba, unless you’re looking for a girlfriend, maybe you should avoid mom.”

Aiba smiled uneasily. “Thanks for the tip, Yukie-chan. I still have to wish her a happy birthday, though.”

“Well, don’t say I didn’t warn you!” She grinned. “So, how’s the recording going? When’s your first single going to be released?”

“We’re still stuck on the B-side. Sho’s arrangements aren’t bad, really, but it’s so -”

“Sho?” Yukie asked, puzzled. “You mean Sakurai-kun?”

“Yeah,” Nino answered, noticing that Aiba’s smile had faltered. “I haven’t told you yet, but he’s working with us for this album, like a collaboration thing.”

“But that’s so cool! Did you invite him over? The neighbors would freak! Mom would really love to see him again, and -”

“Nee-san,” Nino interrupted in a pained voice. “He can’t come; he’s busy. Anyway, it’s not like we’re friends anymore or anything.” His tone indicated that that was all he had to say about the subject, so Yukie decided not to pursue it.

“That’s too bad. Well, come on then. Let’s go meet the birthday girl... er, woman.” She grabbed Aiba’s hands and pulled him forward, while Nino followed behind. “Your mom’s here, too, Aiba. I’m not sure where exactly, but I did see her a few minutes ago.” 

They found Nino and Yukie’s mother talking to Ohno, who looked as though he wished he was somewhere else. That was probably due to the petite girl who seemed to be clinging to his arm, rather than their mother, though. 

“That’s Natsuki,” Yukie said darkly to Aiba. “She may be my cousin, but I think Momo’s smarter than her.”

Momo was the family cat. Aiba remembered that last year, he chased a bird while on the rooftop and fell off the roof. Thankfully, he fell into a bush and was only mildly injured.

“Masaki, you’ve grown!” Nino’s mother exclaimed in delight. She hugged him and Nino, then turned back to look at Aiba critically. “You’ve grown thinner, too. You should fatten up a bit - Yukie, take Aiba to get some food.”

“Mom, I need to get back to my _boyfriend_ before the cousins eat him alive,” Yukie said, emphasising the boyfriend part.

“Oh, he’ll be fine,” her mother said, waving the matter away. “Although I don’t know why you can’t date someone like Masaki here.”

Yukie made a face. “Because it’d be like dating my brother?”

“Aiba’s mother hopes for the two of you to get together too, you know,” Nino’s mom continued, ignoring Yukie. “Which reminds me, I should inform her that Masaki’s here. Yukie, make sure they get something to eat.” She walked off, presumably to find Aiba’s mother.

“I wouldn’t mind something to eat,” Ohno said, extracting himself from Natsuki as gently as he could. His first impulse upon meeting the girl was to run in the opposite direction, but he didn’t want to hurt Ninomiya-san’s feelings, as she was convinced that they were perfect for each other. “Maybe you could show us where to go, and introduce us to your boyfriend?”

“I could take you there, Oh-chan,” Natsuki said, pouting. “I made one of the desserts; you should try it!”

“Putting the cherry on top of the cake does not count as making it,” Yukie said drily. “I think Ryoma is probably impressing the cousins at Grand Slam Tennis, in the living room. So let’s go have some refreshments first, and then I’ll introduce you to him.”

“Oh! I like tennis, so I think I’ll go there first and meet you later,” Natsuki said, and turned to leave.

When she was gone, Ohno looked gratefully at Yukie. “You have no idea how much I love you right now. But is it really okay, to distract her with your boyfriend?”

“It’s fine. If he’s the kind of guy who’d fall for Natsuki, I’d hardly think he’s the guy for me anyway.” She grinned wickedly at Ohno. “Plus, if he falls for her, then you’d be in trouble because my mom might try to fix me up with you, too.”

Ohno just laughed, while Nino groaned. “Believe me, she wasn’t always like this,” Nino said. “I don’t know why, but the last couple of months she has been on this constant matchmaking mode. I think it has something to do with our cousin Ami having a baby.”

Ohno started to ask how many cousins they had, but saw that Aiba was frowning, deep in thought. He turned to Nino, who just shook his head slightly, indicating that they should talk about it later. 

“Where’s Jun?” Nino asked.

“Probably either getting creamed by Ryoma or getting it on with Miyuki. Now, _that_ girl, I’m proud to call a cousin. She’s kind of a boy-magnet in our college, too, so she and Jun just might hit it off.” Yukie answered Nino lightly, so Ohno didn’t know whether she was being serious or not.

He frowned. “Maybe we should find him.”

“I’ll go and get him if you like; you guys should help yourselves to the food before mom decides to kill me,” Yukie said. She pushed paper plates onto their hands, and continued, “go on. Eat!”

She left them and headed towards the living room. Aiba put his plate back down, and said, “I’m not really hungry.”

“What is it?” Ohno asked. “You look like you were crying all of last night.”

Aiba didn’t answer him, so Nino said, “It’s _that guy_.” For some reason, Ohno knew exactly who Nino was talking about. Probably because he had been talking about Sho with that same venom in his voice for the last few weeks.

He looked at Aiba thoughtfully, taking in his gaunt appearance. He hadn’t told any of his friends how badly he wanted their album to work out right. But he couldn’t ignore how it had been affecting them. Nino was angry most of the time, and it didn’t help that the person he was angry at was also the person who was rearranging all of his songs. Aiba was obviously trying to avoid spending too much time in the studio last week, and it pained Ohno to see him looking so desolate. And as for Jun... well. He was pretty much the same, if you didn’t count the number of girls he’d picked up with his “I’m a rock star on the rise” shtick. Ohno had always felt responsible for the younger man, and this time it was worrying him more than usual. But right now, his biggest concern was Aiba. 

“Aiba,” he said, drawing out his words, as if he wished he didn’t have to say it. “If this is all too much for you, we could stop.”

Aiba looked at him in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, we could forget about doing the album with Voyager. It’s not worth it, if it’s affecting you this way.”

Nino nodded. “I agree. We could go on as we used to - we did okay even without a major debut, so I think we’ll be fine. This way you won’t have to see him every day at work.”

“But the new single is going well, and we all know that it’s going to be big. You guys are okay with giving that up?”

“If it makes you feel better, then yes,” Ohno said.

“I’ve been dreading tomorrow,” Aiba confessed. “So I’m not exaggerating when I say that if we stopped, I’d be relieved.” He thought about it, and said, “yes, I actually would like to just forget about doing the album with Voyager.”

Right after he said those words, the three of them fell silent, thinking about the implications of their decision.


	6. Six

“Yes, I actually would like to just forget about doing the album with Voyager.”

The three of them fell silent after Aiba spoke, thinking about the implications of their decision. 

“I guess that’s that, then,” Ohno finally said. “We’ll need to ask Jun what he thinks, of course, but I think he’ll understand.”

“I wasn’t done,” Aiba said, his voice rising slightly. Ohno and Nino turned back to him in surprise. “What I wanted to say was, yes, I _would_ like to just forget about doing the album. But it’s not about me. I’m really glad to be part of Red Shift, because you guys are like family to me. The fact that you’re willing to give up on our debut for me means the world to me. But, it’s not about me.” His voice was shaking. “Red Shift is about all of us, and I won’t have any of you give up on this because of me. And it’s not just our hopes and dreams that we’re talking about; it’s also all of our friends’ and families.”

He paused for a long while, as if waiting for a response. Ohno and Nino were still just looking at him like his words haven’t quite sunk in, so he let out a little laugh. “I guess that was a bit too wordy a speech for me, huh.”

Nino smiled. “Yeah, I haven’t heard you say so much since...” he trailed off, remembering that Aiba had gotten quieter since Sho came back into their lives.

Aiba, too, stopped smiling. “I know,” he said quietly. “I’m sorry to worry you guys so much.”

Ohno nodded and said, “I’m still worried, though. I understand what you mean, about us having to go through with this, but will you be able to handle it?”

“Maybe if I could take a few days off to sort things out,” Aiba said. “We’re going to start recording our instruments separately, anyway, so I could come into the studio and make up for it later.”

“That could work,” Ohno murmured, mulling over the idea. “All right. I’ll talk it over with Yamanaka-san. You don’t have to come in tomorrow.”

“Hey, there you guys are!” The three of them turned to see Jun walking over, a large grin on his face, and a pretty girl by his side. “Why are you guys looking so serious? What did I miss?”

Nino, Aiba and Ohno looked at each other, and turned back to Jun. “Nothing,” they said in unison.

“Sounds suspicious,” Jun said, “but I’ll let it go for now.” He proceeded to introduce the girl, who turned out to be Miyuki, one of Nino and Yukie’s cousins. The cousins - there were five of them, Ohno discovered - had decided to go out drinking together with Yukie and Ryoma, and wanted to know if the rest of them wanted to go. “Your mom said it’s okay,” Jun said to reassure Nino. “She said we were getting too noisy in the living room anyway.”

“I’m not in the mood,” Aiba said. “I’d like to go home, actually.”

“I’ll go with you, then,” Nino told Aiba. “Just let me say goodbye to mom, first.”

“I meant my parents’ place, across the street,” Aiba answered.

“Oh. Yeah. I forgot about that. So you won’t be coming back with us tonight?”

“I don’t think so. I might go back tomorrow or the day after. I just want to be here for awhile.”

“Okay.” Nino then said to Jun, “I don’t really feel like going out, either, though. I’ll probably stay here for awhile before going home.”

“What about you, Oh-chan?” 

Ohno was already ready to leave. “Guess I’ll go,” he said. “Somebody has to keep watch over you.”

“I’m not a kid, you know.” Jun rolled his eyes, but Ohno was completely serious.

“You behave like one, especially when you’re drunk.”

“I do not!”

They were still going on like that when they left Nino and Aiba, while Miyuki trailed after them with an amused look on her face. She was the only one who waved goodbye at the two left behind, as Jun and Ohno were too busy arguing about whether or not Jun needed looking after.

Left alone, Nino asked Aiba, “you’re going to be okay?”

“I got over him once,” Aiba replied. “When this is all over, I’ll just have to get over him again.”

})i({

When the guests have all left, Nino told his mother to take a break while he cleaned up. It took him a good part of an hour to get the house to look like it did normally, and that didn’t include the kitchen, which had dishes piled up in the sink. His mother had told him to leave those behind, because she didn’t trust him with the dishes.

“All because I broke a couple of them when I was eleven,” he grumbled, as he finally sunk into the living room sofa. He thought about playing some video games before heading home, when the doorbell rang. Thinking that it was Yukie, he groaned and stretched before getting up to open the door.

It wasn’t his sister.

Nino blinked at the figure in front of him, before finally saying harshly, “I thought I made it clear that I didn’t want you to come.”

Sho looked determined as he said, “I just wanted to give this to your mom. She was more like a mom to me than my own in high school; it’s not right that I forget that, just because you’re being childish.”

Nino wanted to snap at the childish comment, but in the end he just bit out coldly, “Fine.” He grabbed the gift in Sho’s hands, and placed it at the end table near the door. “She’s gone to bed already. I’ll leave it here for her.” 

“I also came here to talk.”

“I have nothing to say to you.” He paused. “Except maybe to say that it’s really stupid and conspicuous, wearing shades this late in the day.”

“Then listen,” Sho insisted, as he took off his sunglasses and placed them carelessly in his pocket. “Look, we were friends once.”

“ _Were_ being the operative word,” Nino interjected.

“I’d like for us to be friends again. Or, if that isn’t possible, I’d like for things to at least be okay between us.”

Sho was still standing in the doorway, knowing that Nino wouldn’t want him to come in. Nino was holding the door, like he was preparing to slam it in Sho’s face at any moment.

“You want us to be friends?” Nino let out a short, humourless laugh.

“If Aiba could forgive me, then why can’t you?”

Nino shook his head in disbelief. “You think that he’s forgiven you? Well, maybe he has. He’s just that sort of person. But if you think that what you’ve done doesn’t kill him a little every day, then you’re really a bigger idiot than I thought. You broke his heart, Sho. I know that it was years ago, but this is Aiba we’re talking about. I don’t know if he’ll ever really get over this, or over you. And then you think you could waltz back into our lives, pat him on the head and say you want to be friends, while parading your fiancée in front of him?” His words came out fast, and vicious. His fingers had curled into a fist. “I thought I knew you, but now I really don’t know.”

Sho frowned. “What are you talking about?”

“Don’t fuck with me!” Nino shouted. He started to slam the door, but Sho caught it in time and shoved it back open, and took a step into the house. 

“I asked,” Sho said, slowly and with infuriating calmness, “what were you talking about.” He looked at Nino squarely in the eye and said, “Hit me if you want, but don’t think I won’t hit back. You know, getting bloody isn’t going to solve anything.”

“Yeah? Well, I bet it’ll make me feel better,” Nino muttered, and swung.

Sho took the punch, and returned it. For a moment after they stared at each other, one of them sporting a bloody lip (Sho) while the other was going to have to go to work tomorrow with a black eye (Nino). When Nino swung at him a second time, Sho dodged and was about to throw a punch in return, but a voice stopped them.

“Are you guys trying to wake up the entire neighbourhood?” Yukie asked from behind Sho. 

The two of them looked at her, and Nino practically growled out his words as he said, “Stay out of this.”

“I wish I could, but I’m in need of sleep and you’re both kind of in the way. Plus, you don’t want to wake mom up, do you?” 

Sho stepped away from the doorway and said, “I’m sorry. It’s great to see you again, Yukie-neesan. You’ve grown into a beautiful woman, I see.”

Yukie laughed. “Who are you kidding? We all know that _he_ ,” she said, pointing to her brother, “inherited all the beauty in the family. Good thing I’ve got all the brains.” She took Sho’s hands, and squeezed gently. “It’s great to see you again. Come again sometime, when you and my idiot of a brother aren’t trying to kill each other, okay?” Letting go of his hands, Yukie walked in and shoved both Sho and Nino out of the house. “Now, go away. Kazu-chan, you have work tomorrow so you can’t sleep over anyway. Plus the two of you seriously need to talk.” When Nino opened his mouth to protest, she said, “I’m not hearing it, whatever it is. Go. Talk. Scoot.” With a final shove at Nino, she closed the door. 

Nino and Sho regarded each other warily. “Are you done now?” Sho asked. “Or are we still going to throw punches at each other, like kids?”

“Damn it! I hate that you’re always so fucking _reasonable_ about things,” Nino groused. He walked out to the front gate, and sat on the sidewalk. When Sho came over and sat next to him, he sighed. “I’m too tired for this conversation,” he muttered. “Whatever this conversation is.”

“Explain to me what you were talking about earlier.”

“Which part? I think we’ve pretty much covered that you’re an asshole.”

“Okay. Fine, I’m an asshole,” Sho retorted in irritation. “But what did you mean, about Aiba? He told me that he’s fine.”

“For someone so smart, you’re _really stupid_ ,” Nino told Sho. “Aiba said he’s fine because he didn’t want you to feel bad. You didn’t see him today,” he said, remembering Aiba’s pale, haunted expression. “He looked like he’s going to fall apart at any moment. We almost decided to give up on Voyager, because of you.”

“I see,” Sho murmured quietly. “I didn’t know. I really didn’t know. If I did, I would’ve - well, you don’t have to pull out of the project. I will, if it would make him feel better. Yamanaka-san could get another collaborator to work with you, easy.” 

Nino shook his head. “Not necessary, now. Aiba’s going to take a few days off work. I guess we’ll see how things go when he’s back.” 

“And what was thing about my fiancée?” Sho asked, suddenly remembering the rest of Nino’s outburst. “Because as far as I know, I haven’t got one.”

“What?” Nino looked at Sho in surprise. “You’re not engaged to Michiyo?”

“Michiyo?” Sho remembered his lunch with Michiyo the day before, and Aiba walking in on them. “Is that what this is about?” He laughed. “She’ll love to hear about this.” 

“It’s not funny from Aiba’s point of view,” Nino said, annoyed.

“I guess not,” Sho agreed, sobering up. “Look, we haven’t seen each other in ages, so when she called out of the blue and said she was in town, I decided to meet her for lunch. She’s newly engaged, but not to me. Do you remember the guy she dated before me, way back in high school?”

“He was from another school, right?” Nino frowned, and tried to remember. “Did they get back together or something?”

“No. They liked each other, but were both in love with someone else. She thought it was me for awhile, but it actually turned out to be her other ex’s elder brother.”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

“Wow,” Nino mused. “So you got dumped by Michiyo.”

“So it would seem.”

“My condolences.”

“Well, it was in college, and there really weren’t any hard feelings between us.”

“So do you regret dumping Aiba for her?”

Sho gave Nino a look. “We both know that Michiyo wasn’t why Aiba and I broke up.”

“No, we don’t, actually,” Nino said coolly. “I don’t know what you know, and I certainly don’t know what Aiba knew, since he pretty much clammed up on the subject of you after the break-up. All I know was it was my fault that my best friend got his heart broken, because if I didn’t introduce the two of you, none of this would’ve happened.”

“Did you think that it was easy for me? I didn’t just lose him, you know. I lost you, too. He may be your best friend, Nino, but you were mine.” Sho stood up, and brushed dirt off his pants. He didn’t turn to look at Nino as he reached into his pocket to retrieve his sunglasses. “Here,” he said. “You’re going to need this tomorrow, if you don’t want too many questions about your eye from the staff.” He dropped the shades onto Nino’s lap, and left.


	7. Seven

Aiba Yusuke was reading a manga and listening to his mp3 player when he heard the door to the room next to his slam. He clicked off his player, curious, as nobody had gone into his brother’s room since he moved out. He laid the manga he was reading down and set aside his player to get up and knock on his brother’s door. 

“What.” The voice was muffled, but it was definitely his brother.

“Nii-chan, what are you doing back?” He opened the door and saw Aiba lying on his back on the bed, with a pillow on his face.

“It’s Ninomiya-san’s birthday,” Aiba answered, pulling the pillow away from his face.

“You’re not going back to your place tonight?”

“No, I think I’m staying here for a day or two. I've already told mom.”

“But aren’t you, like, working on your debut single or something?”

Aiba made a face, and covered his face with the pillow again. “Yeah. Don’t ask.”

Yuu sat down at the edge of Aiba’s bed, and shook his brother’s leg. “Hey...,” he said in a mock-whining voice he knew Aiba hated, “Tell me!”

Aiba ignored his brother, but Yuu pulled the pillow covering Aiba’s face away. Aiba turned to his side, so that his back faced Yuu. For a while Yuu thought that his brother wasn’t going to say anything, but when he was about to get up and leave Aiba alone, Aiba spoke.

“It’s Sho-chan.”

“What?” Yuu was glad that he was sitting down. “Don’t tell me you’re still hung up on him.”

“He’s collaborating on our first album,” Aiba explained. “So I’ve been seeing him at work all the time.” 

“Do you miss him?” Yuu asked quietly. 

Aiba took a long time to answer. His voice sounded strange, like he was crying, but Yuu couldn’t see his face. He remembered how Aiba was when he broke up with Sho, and swallowed. He hoped that his brother wouldn’t go through this a second time. “I didn’t think I would,” Aiba finally said. “But the moment he walked in the door, it was like all these years had meant nothing, and I’m still that person crying over him, not understanding a thing.”

“I’m sorry,” Yuu said, in the same quiet tone. “I’m very sorry, Nii-chan.”

“You don’t have to be sorry. I’m the stupid one.”

“No, you’re not,” Yuu insisted. “That thing, almost seven years ago...”

“When Sho dumped me without saying why, and refused to talk to anyone for over a week?” Aiba’s tone was dry and self-deprecating, as if he himself realised how melodramatic his relationship with Sho had been. At least, he thought, it was like that to him. Sho hadn’t seem all that affected at all.

“Yeah.” Yuu took a deep breath, and said quickly, “it was my fault.”

Aiba stiffened, but didn’t say anything. After a minute or so, he turned back to face his brother, and sat up. “What do you mean by that?” he asked.

“I asked him to break up with you.”

“You... what?” Aiba was confused. “Why?”

“Because he was hurting you!” Yuu exclaimed, raising his voice. “I hated the way he was treating you. And – I thought you deserved a better relationship.” His voice grew smaller as he admitted, “I thought you deserved a more _normal_ relationship.”

“Why?”

“What do you mean, why? I told you why.”

“Why didn’t you tell me this before, when it was killing me not to know why he left? Why did you think you had the right to interfere in my life? Why was it so... _abnormal_ to be in love with someone?” Aiba brushed away his tears angrily, and continued, “I know he messed up a lot, but so did I. I should’ve been more supportive of his decision to go to college. I shouldn’t have made it such a big deal when he decided to debut as a solo artist. I should've fought harder to keep him, instead of letting him leave me so easily. I was just as much to blame as he was, and it all didn’t matter anyway, because I _loved_ him. I still love him.”

Ashamed, and overwhelmed by guilt, Yuu mumbled another apology. “I’m sorry, Nii-chan. I really am. I promise that I’ll support you, if you still love him.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Aiba said dully, the fire that was in his eyes suddenly extinguished. “He’s moved on. He’s engaged.”

“Nii-chan.” Yuu moved forward to give Aiba a comforting hug, but Aiba shrugged his hands away.

“I want to be alone, now,” Aiba said, looking away.

Yuu retreated, and studied his brother’s thin frame for a moment. “I’m sorry,” he said again, as he finally left the room, closing the door behind him.

})i({

When Nino walked into the studio, heads turned. Yamanaka-san just raised an eyebrow at the sight of him in Sho’s sunglasses, and Ohno kind of gaped in surprise, while Jun gave a low whistle.

“My, my, what do we have here?” Jun asked in a teasing voice. “A diva, or a loser sporting a shiner?” He leaned over and tried to lift the sunglasses off Nino, but Nino slapped his hands away and scowled. Jun just smirked as Nino took of the glasses and threw them in Sho’s direction. 

“These don’t work at all,” he complained.

Sho caught the glasses mid-air and smiled. “I said that the staff won’t bother you; I didn’t say anything about the band.”

Nino couldn’t answer him, because Jun had placed his hands on either side of Nino’s head to keep him still, and was taking a closer look at his black eye. “Lemme go,” he muttered.

Jun, strangely compliant, let go and said to Yamanaka-san, “Let’s get started.”

})i({

Since they were recording their instruments individually and Aiba wasn’t around, they finished the day’s work faster than usual. Nino seemed to have quit antagonising Sho - he still made snarky remarks now and then, but it didn’t carry the same venom his words usually did - which also helped, a lot. By noon that day, Yamanaka-san said that they could have the rest of the day off.

“Ni~no,” Jun called out when he saw Nino hurrying to leave.

“What is it?”

“You’re having lunch with us.”

“No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are.” Jun turned to Ohno in support. “He is, right?”

Ohno just shrugged, but when Jun gave him a pointed look he turned to Nino and said firmly, “Nino, you’re having lunch with us.”

Nino sighed in exasperation, and said, “Fine. But you guys are paying. I’ll wait outside.”

When Nino left, Ohno asked Jun, “What was that all about?”

“I think it’s about time Nino spill the beans on Aiba.”

“He’ll tell us when he wants to tell us.”

“He’ll never tell us if we just wait for him to do so!”

“Jun, you shouldn’t interfere in Aiba’s personal matters.”

“But – it’s _Aiba_. I can’t just leave it alone, you know that.”

“Jun, don’t you think that...” Ohno trailed off when he saw that Sho had returned to the studio. 

“Sorry to interrupt,” Sho said. “Yamanaka-san said that we’re done with the single for now, except for Aiba’s parts of course. We’re all given a couple of days off before we come back to work on the album. And there’s the next single to think of,” he mused. “Anyway, tell the rest, okay? I’m taking a week’s break anyway, so tell Aiba that he could come in to record his parts while I’m gone.” As soon as he gave the message to Jun and Ohno, he left.

})i({

Aiba had planned to sleep in that day, but he couldn’t fall asleep. Instead, he picked up one of the acoustic guitars he had left behind when he moved out, and tuned it. It was old, but it didn’t show any sign of wear. He hadn’t used it much, even in high school. He took up playing bass when their then-bassist, Suzuki, left the band, and he hadn’t looked back. He started strumming the guitar for awhile, humming along, in brief starts and stops.

When his phone rang, he set aside the guitar to pick it up. “Aiba here.”

“Finally! I was going to tell you right after work, but Ohno and Jun won’t leave me alone.”

“Nino! I’m writing a new song, want to hear it?”

“Later, maybe. I have something important to tell you.”

“More important than my song?”

“Aiba, will you just listen to me? As I said, I was going to tell you last night before I left, really, but when I went over Yuu-chan said you were already asleep, so I thought I’d call you in the morning but I woke up late and had to rush to the studio, and then after work I was ambushed by Jun and Ohno who grilled me about you and Sho, and-”

“Did you tell them?”

“Yeah. Sorry. But listen -”

“What did they say?”

“Well, Jun said that if the world was fair, Sho would be the one to come in the studio with a black eye and not me, but anyway -”

“Why’d you have a black eye?”

“Aiba. _Shut up and listen to me_.”

“What?”

“Sho’s not engaged.”

Nino paused, waiting for a reply, but Aiba was silent on the other side. “Aiba?” he asked. “Did you hear me?”

“What?” Aiba sounded very faint.

“It was all a misunderstanding. You see, Michiyo _did_ get engaged, but to someone else, and when you met them she was only just having a friendly lunch with Sho.”

Still no reply from Aiba.

“Aiba?” When Nino heard the dial tone, he cursed.

Aiba had hung up on him.

})i({

Yuu was studying when Aiba burst into his room. He pulled his earphones out - he always studied to loud music - and looked questioningly at his brother.

“Sho-chan’s not engaged,” Aiba said.

Yuu blinked. All this time he had thought that girls bring too much drama into his life, and now he was discovering that guys were the same. “Are you sure?”

“What do you mean, am I sure?” Aiba asked, testy.

“Well, you seemed sure that he _was_ engaged, yesterday.”

“It was a misunderstanding. Nino called me to tell me I was wrong.”

“All right.” Yuu clicked off his mp3 player, and regarded his brother seriously. What should he do, he wondered. It would be great if Aiba and Sho could get back together, because Yuu had to admit that he was wrong in thinking that Aiba would be happier without Sho. But would it really be that easy? It had almost been seven years to the date of their break-up. People change. He didn’t know how much Sho might have changed, and neither did Aiba. “What do you want to do about that?” he asked Aiba tentatively. 

All the restlessness Aiba had been feeling drained away, as he contemplated Yuu’s question. “I don’t know,” he admitted. “He may not be engaged, but he never indicated that he wanted to get back together or anything. He _does_ seem like he’s moved on.” He walked over to Yuu’s bed and sat down.

“I think you and Sho need to talk about this.” Yuu looked at Aiba apologetically and continued, “I asked him to break up with you, but he had his reasons for agreeing with me. Whether or not the two of you get back together, you need to sort it out between yourselves.”

Aiba thought about what Yuu said, and nodded. “You’re probably right.” He stood up to leave, when his phone rang again. He walked out of Yuu’s room and picked it up.

“Nino?”

“Why’d you hang up on me? Idiot!”

“Sorry. I just needed to think for a bit.”

“Jun and Ohno said to tell you that the studio is clear if you want to come in to do your parts, because Sho wouldn’t be in.”

“But I need to - why wouldn’t he be in?”

“He’s taking a week off. Yamanaka-san said that it’s because he’s finally finished his new single and wants to take a break, but I think it’s really because I told him that you couldn’t stand working in the same studio as him.”

“You... told him that?”

“Well, not in those words exactly, but I did mention that we almost pulled the plug on our Voyager deal because of him.”

“Why did you tell him that?” Aiba asked Nino, and then wondered to himself, “Why is it that everyone else keep telling him what I wanted without even asking me first?”

Nino was quiet for awhile. Aiba thought that he had hung up at first, but then he said, “I’m sorry. It’s just that he made me so mad yesterday, and you know how I get.”

Aiba nodded. Then, realising that Nino couldn’t see him, he said out loud, “I know.” He sighed. “It’s okay, really, but I wanted to talk to him. Get everything out in the open for once.”

“I can ask Yamanaka-san for you, if you like.”

“I - hold on for a sec.” Aiba put a hand over the phone and turned to Yuu, who had walked out and tapped him on the shoulder. “What is it?”

“I just realised something,” his brother said.

“So, what is it?”

“Tomorrow will be _exactly_ seven years to the day of your break up. Exactly.” 

Aiba looked at Yuu in confusion for awhile, and then realised what his brother meant. As he thought on what had transpired during their break-up, another realisation, one his brother knew nothing about, dawned on him. He mouthed a thank you to his brother, and went back to his phone.

“Nino?”

“Hmm?”

“It’s okay, I think I know where Sho is.”


	8. Eight

Sho gazed at the lake from his balcony. The sun was beginning to set. He remembered talking to Aiba at the very same balcony, only a few weeks ago. When he brought Red Shift to his lake house, he had hoped that Aiba would notice, or remember. 

_I should’ve just told him_ , Sho thought. _But of course my stupid pride got in the way._

A loud crash from downstairs jerked him out of his thoughts. He stood up, and headed downstairs warily. He had bought the place as soon as he gained access to his trust fund, during his first year in college. His parents thought he had gone crazy, spending all the money in one go. In all the years since then, there haven’t been any problems with break-ins, but there’s always the first time. He usually kept the large house fully staffed throughout the year, except the one week each year that he spent there, so that he could be alone.

When he heard a second crash in the kitchen, he felt a little relieved. Surely a thief wouldn’t be making so much noise? Maybe a stray cat had come in somehow. He paused in front of the kitchen doorway, and peered in.

Aiba was sitting down amidst several pots and pans on the floor, cursing.

“If you’re moonlighting as a thief, you should stick to your day job,” Sho commented, amused by the sight.

“Why’d you have to have such a big kitchen, anyway?” Aiba muttered angrily. “I just opened that door and all these stuff fell on me.”

Sho walked in and pulled Aiba up. “What were you doing in my kitchen in the first place?”

“I wanted to put your birthday cake in the fridge first, but you don’t seem to have one,” Aiba answered shortly. He turned to the cake, and saw that a large pan had fallen on the cake box. “Great. Now it’s ruined.” He picked up the box, and took a quick look. “I guess it’s still edible, if a little squashed.”

“The fridges are through that door over there, I think,” Sho said, pointing. He picked up the fallen kitchenware and stacked them on the nearest counter. When Aiba returned, he asked, “How’d you get in?”

“One of the windows was open,” Aiba said. “You should be more careful, really.”

“One of the maids probably forgot to close it when they left.” Sho looked at Aiba uncertainly, amazed that after seven years, Aiba still made him feel like an awkward teenager. However, that didn’t mean that he had to act like one, he reminded himself. “Now, why don’t you tell me why you’re here? Other than delivering a cake, that is.”

“I - that is... well.” Now that the crisis of the cake was over, Aiba didn’t know what to say. He had concentrated too much on getting to Sho’s place that he hadn’t thought of what he wanted to do once he got there. “Aiba Cake Delivery Service, uhm, at your service! Sorry for breaking into your house?” 

“I was going to sit on the deck outside to watch the sunset. Why don’t you join me?”

Aiba followed Sho out, where they sat facing the lake. “It’s really beautiful out here,” Aiba murmured. Sho just closed his eyes, enjoying the sun, and didn’t say a thing. _Just one moment_ , he thought to himself. _Just give me this moment to pretend everything was like how it’s supposed to be._

“Do you know,” Aiba said, breaking off Sho’s thoughts, “that taking the train here takes so much longer than by plane? I set out yesterday!”

Sho laughed. “Of course the train would take longer. Isn’t that common sense?”

“I didn’t think about that,” Aiba admitted. “All I remembered was it didn’t take us that long to arrive the last time we came.”

Sho didn’t answer, but when Aiba turned to look at him, he saw that Sho was smiling in amusement. Aiba’s heart skipped a beat. _Calm down_ , he told himself. _You don’t know if he still feels the same way about you._

“I just realised, yesterday...” Aiba said softly, gathering his courage. “This house used to be a small hotel, didn’t it?”

Sho’s eyes flickered open, and he turned to look at Aiba. “Yeah. I had it renovated into a house when I bought it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me, the last time we came?”

“I wanted you to realise it yourself,” Sho murmured. 

“I knew the placed looked familiar,” Aiba said, “but it looks different now, from the hotel brochure. This was the place I was going to take you, on your birthday, seven years ago.”

Sho nodded. “I know. I only stay here a week of every year.”

Aiba’s throat felt dry. “On your birthday?”

Sho let out a short laugh, remembering that Aiba had once asked the very same question, in very much the same tone. “Better mine than yours,” he murmured.

“Sho-chan.”

“Hmm?”

“You never do things like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like spending a large amount of money just to be here a week in a whole year. You’re never that extravagant, that irresponsible with money. Can’t you just book a place at the hotel like a normal person?”

“I wanted this place,” Sho said, as if it was that simple. “It was a piece of you, kind of. When I’m here, I felt like you were here, too. I could pretend that things were how they should’ve been, if I had done things differently, and had come here with you instead.”

Aiba shook his head. “I had a lot of time to think, on the train ride here. If we hadn’t broken up back then, I don’t know what would’ve happened. We probably would’ve come here, and we probably would’ve been happy. I was looking forward to surprising you with the trip, so much,” he said. “But after that? I know your parents. They would probably have disowned you if you didn’t go to the college they chose. You would have had a hard time trying to build your career and keep our relationship a secret. And if you didn’t leave the band to do your own thing, you probably would have ended up blaming me for never being able to be all you’re capable of being.”

“I would never blame you.”

“Yes, you would,” Aiba insisted. “Over time, you would. Maybe there was a way for us to be together despite all that, but I doubt that we would’ve found it back then. We were still kids, each of us bent on having things our own way.”

“We’re not kids anymore.”

“No, we’re not.”

They looked at each other for awhile, not knowing what to say. Aiba wondered where all the things he had planned to say, and ask, went - he couldn’t remember any of it. Sho felt as if his heart would explode right out of his chest, it was beating so hard. “Maybe I’m still a kid after all,” he said wryly. “I’m certainly behaving like one.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Aiba started to say, but Sho had moved closer, and taken hold of his shoulders. Sho eased Aiba to him, and saw Aiba’s eyes widen as their lips touched. He had expected Aiba to push him away, but the other man only gave a breathy sigh, and parted his lips, inviting Sho to deepen the kiss. Sho wondered at how Aiba tasted familiar and strange at the same time, and how that taste sent sizzles coursing through his veins. He had always wanted Aiba, but this feeling was stronger, somehow. Rather than the feverish desire he remembered, what he was feeling was richer, calmer, and yet more pleasurable, more passionate at the same time. He didn’t know that people actually could feel this way.

Aiba’s hands had taken hold of him, shifting their position so that Aiba was kneeling over Sho. His throat hummed in pleasure, and his hands moved from Aiba’s shoulders, over his back, finally settling on his hips. He wanted to get up, drag Aiba into the house, and finish what his impulse had started, but Aiba had already stilled, and jolted away from Sho, gasping for breath.

“It’s getting dark,” Aiba said, getting up, still breathing heavily. “I have to...” he took another breath, trying to think of something. “I just have to go.” He left Sho, and hurried into the house, presumably to get his things.

Sho let out a curse, and glanced at the cold lake, and down at himself. “Me and my... stupid,” he muttered to himself. “So stupid. You’re not a fucking teenager anymore. Stop acting like one.” He unbuttoned his shirt, and let it fall to the floor as he got up, and dove into the water.

The good thing about living on a lake was that you always had the lake to jump into when you needed a cold shower.

})i({

When Sho finally surfaced, he grabbed his shirt and shrugged it on, but didn’t bother to button it back up, as he was dripping wet and needed to change anyway. He trudged through the vast living area, which used to be the hotel lobby, not bothering to turn on the lights. He was going to head up to his room, when he noticed a small light in the kitchen, so he went there instead, and hoped.

A birthday cake, slightly battered by the pan, sat on the kitchen counter. A single candle was on it, newly lit. On the other side of the counter was Aiba.

“I thought you’d left,” Sho said hoarsely. He swallowed, and stepped forward. 

“I couldn’t leave yet,” Aiba said. “Not without wishing you a happy birthday first.”

_Yet_.

The word hung over Sho like a dark cloud, reminding him that Aiba was no longer his, and that he had no right to stop him, not after giving up on Aiba so many years ago.

“Why did you come here?”

“I told you.”

“No, you didn’t. I asked, but you didn’t answer.”

“I wanted to know why you listened to Yuu-chan when he asked you to leave me,” Aiba said. “But I’ve figured out the answer on the way here.” He looked down at the cake, and frowned at the candle, a quarter of which had been burned away. “I also wanted to tell you that I’m still in love with you. I always felt like I should have gone after you, when you left... so here I am. Chasing after you.” He looked back at Sho, his eyes a little wild. “I’m not trying to pressure you or make you feel bad or anything. I just thought... that you should know.”

Sho crossed over into the kitchen, walked around the counter, and embraced Aiba, burying his face in curve of Aiba’s neck. He breathed in. Aiba smelled of soap and salt. Aiba smelled like home. “I still love you, too,” he murmured. “I’ve missed you so much.”

Aiba stiffened, and asked warily, “What did you say?”

“I’ve missed you. So much.”

“No, before that.”

Sho lifted his head, and looked at Aiba in the eye. “I love you?”

Tremulously, Aiba said, “you’ve never said that before.”

“Yes, I have.”

“No, you haven’t. Throughout the whole time we’ve been together, you’ve never said it.”

“Well, I was young and stupid, and too proud to know what’s good for me, then,” Sho said, causing Aiba to laugh softly. He smiled and leaned forward so that their foreheads touched, and said, “Aiba Masaki, I love you. Please take me back. I’m begging you.”

“Sho-chan...?”

“Hmm?”

“You’re kind of dripping all over me.”

“Oh. Sorry.” Sho pulled back quickly, and banged his elbow on the edge of the counter. “Fuck!” He rubbed at his elbow. “Oww...”

Aiba doubled over, clutching Sho’s other arm. His shoulders were trembling with laughter. “You’re still such a dork,” he said.

“Glad that I amuse you,” Sho muttered. “My elbow really hurts.”

Aiba bit his lip, and sobered up, but Sho could still see the laughter in his eyes. “You should change, before you catch a cold,” Aiba said. “But first, you should -” he turned to the cake, but the light on the candle had already flickered away. “Does the wish still work if you light the candle twice?” he asked.

“It’s okay. I’ve finally got the wish I made seven years ago,” Sho answered. 

This time, when Sho leaned over to kiss him, Aiba didn’t complain about the wet hair and clothes.

**Author's Note:**

> This was actually the very first Arashi fic I wrote! All the other stuff just sprung up after I wrote this one. This was originally for my then-roommate, who was a Sakuraiba fan.


End file.
